From the category archives:

Letters to baby

Letter #1

by Milton on Wed, Oct 28th, 2009

in Letters to baby,Week 13

Dear baby,

I guess you’re a fetus still, and you’ll become a baby when you graduate from the womb. Still, fetus is pretty cool. I was a fetus once. I don’t remember much about it, probably because my neurons weren’t connected yet and whatever memories were sitting in my blobby little head got rolled over by the crazy mob of neurons that developed every corner of my cranium in the first couple years of being a baby.

You’ll get there.

Right now you’re developing teeth, I hear, and your eyes are closing (now that they have lids) and won’t open again until you see that crazy light-at-the-beginning-of-the-tunnel in the room of your first graduation. I’m learning about eyes all over again in my book. Rods, cones, the fact that your subconscious starts seeing things before your frontal-lobe does, the fact that the way to determine “where” the things you’re seeing grows separately from the part that determines “what” you’re seeing. Reading these books is fun, it passes the time. But mostly I just want to know what you’re doing right now.

I have this weird desire to write you songs on my guitar. It might be my first “Dad-impulse”. No, that’s not true, I did also try to talk to you once, through Esther’s belly. But then I remembered you can’t really hear yet, but you can feel sounds, so I said really low mumbly words. Hope you felt it.

We are also tossing around a lot of baby names. You know, it’s difficult because we don’t know if you’re a boy or a girl. So I tend to like the unisex names right now, cause they just work. I thought of one today that I haven’t told Esther yet. We’ll see. Names don’t last very long here. We might have to change your name every year. Maybe we’ll give you 18 names, one that you peel off every year, and then you can choose your own. Would you sue us if we did that?

I should simplify these letters to you. It’s not like I’m writing to your 10-year old self yet. It’s maybe a little rude to use words that you won’t understand for a while. But I am not a big fan of baby talk. In fact, I plan on talking to you like a regular person from the get-go. That’s my plan. Who knows if there’s some weird drug they give you at the hospital that makes you revert to a baby-talking parent whenever you’re around babies. I mean, words are words, right? And you’re not going to understand anything anyway, so why give it a high-pitched tone with lots of fluffy vowels?

Anyway, Esther’s home, I’m gonna sign off for now. Keep cookin’ in there!