Penny Simkin, the wonderful doula who taught our class, calls the pre-labor water break The Hollywood Break. I figured it probably wouldn’t happen to me, and had honestly rather hoped that comfortable sac of water would stay in place for a good long portion of my labor. But here I am, 11 hours after shoving a dozen paper towels between my legs as I laughed hysterically during a bathroom trip at our favorite cabaret bar, still giggling over the drama.
I had just finished sitting through a set break at our table on stage right. We were watching and laughing at a couple seated front and center of the stage who obviously felt they were the only couple in the room. They were all over each other! I’ll admit, it was kind of hot. We remarked about how nice it was to have entertainment while The Heavenly Spies took their break. I thought a bit about what it’s like to be so in love and attracted to each other that you forget that there is a whole world outside of your being, and remembered times with my husband that felt like that. I remembered feeling that way just a few months ago, when we took in TWO back to back Can Can shows for Valentine’s Day and had a terrific time together.
I thought about how Ina May Gaskin says something like, “It’s that loving sexy energy that gets the baby into your body, and it’s that loving sexy energy that will get him out,” and I wondered, will loving sexy energy from couples heavily making out right in front of me, in one of my favorite places, while I’m with my husband and my best friend watching beautiful women with hardly any clothing on dance their hearts out, count? If so, I was feeling as if this lucky crane should really start presenting himself soon.
At that moment, I stood up to use the bathroom. I paused to consider the small gush and pushed my way through the crowd towards the bathroom. By the time I got to the door, things had become surreal. The Heavenly Spies were back on the stage, the crowd was howling, and I was sopping wet.
Sadly, labor contractions are not really kicking in. It’s looking as if I will be drinking a Castor Oil concoction in about an hour. This is a little frightening, but I’m mostly excited. I guess I’ll take a quick nap, first.
Labor on a crazy Saturday. While (pardon me for saying so, but I must) all the crazy slutty girls from the East Side in their ridiculous 6″ heels parade around with their douche bag boyfriends while drunkenly howling, fighting, and shooting each other outside the windows of our beloved little loft, we’ll be howling an entirely different song from the inside. I love it!