Speaking of the world trying to manage my diet decisions, the guy at Whole Foods suggested to my husband a few weeks ago that I should not be ordering a tuna melt. It’s nice that he cares enough to say something but I’m pretty sure that I can gauge how much tuna is too much after reading the million books and trolling the internet for a trillion hours. Good grief! What he did not know is that I was craving dairy, but am lactose intolerant. I imagine he would have given me a *very* cross bad mom look had I told him that much AND ordered a beer.

Alcohol in excess is also not good for a man’s sperm count while trying to conceive. Advanced paternal age also ups your chance of having a problem with the baby. But by no means do we ever hear men being told not to drink ANYTHING at all, and we certainly don’t balk at a 50 year old man trying to conceive. It’s an obvious double standard.

Aside from that, the whole issue of assuming that the American people are stupid is really pressing at me lately. We can’t roast a chicken! It’s too hard. Buy a prepared chicken at the grocery store. We can’t have our babies naturally! It’s too hard. Opt early for an elective c-section or at the very least get an epidural and end up with a 35% chance of a section in even our best hospitals, anyhow. Don’t drink only 1 or 2 glasses of wine a week, lady! You can’t handle it! You’ll go off the deep end and end up a smoking, drinking gutter punk with a defected baby. I won’t accept the assumption that American folk can’t do some self-educating, make reasonable choices that provide for healthy lives, roast a darn chicken by themselves. If we’re lazy, it’s partly because we’re listening to all the hype and marketing and not being self-aware.

For the record, I have had one glass of delicious wine a week since the end of my first trimester. I’ve enjoyed every glass without guilt, and I’m 100% certain that this baby will not have FAS.