We found a doula!

by Esther on Sat, Jan 9th, 2010

in Doctors, midwives, and doulas,Week 22

Walking through the doors of pregnancy and all of it’s unknown factors, Milton and I have had lots of questions and lots of aha moments to answer them.  At first, we weren’t even totally comfortable talking about a home birth.  At first glance, it didn’t seem like the safe option.  One book in the right direction and suddenly we found ourselves on the path of home birth research.  This has led to us meeting some pretty amazing people in the Seattle Midwifery community.  We feel very cosy at our monthly midwife appointments and like we can call their office with any questions or concerns that we have.

It was at Rainy City Midwifery that we were approached about possibly hiring a doula.  At first, it really didn’t feel necessary.  Between the 20 books we’ve already read, the 40 books we’re bound to read, the class we’re going to take with The Mother of all Doulas, and the 1,394 people we talk to who give us advice (unsolicited or otherwise), it seems like we could lasso in this whole laboring experience and take it to the moon, right?

Well.  Sort of.

The more we started to visualize our birthing experience, and the more we talked to the midwifes at Rainy City, the more we started to think that we should look for someone else to help us on our journey.  It’s not that we don’t trust ourselves.  It’s certainly not that I don’t trust my body.  It’s not that I don’t trust my midwifes to act in my favor and do everything they can to support and protect my family.  I have trust in all of these things!  It’s more that I am fairly certain that much of what my husband and I learn about pregnancy and labor will fly out the window without a good mediator who has a whole lot of experience with the process of saying hello to babies.  I could be in labor for 3 days, after all!  No matter how much my husband and I adore each other, he is going to need a break.  I am going to need a break.  We are going to need encouragement and knowledge to help us along so that fear doesn’t take over the experience of  bringing life.  There is potentially a long stretch of time between when labor begins and when my midwife arrives when I am going to need a woman who knows what she’s doing to help me out with crazy things that I have never really thought about… like calming to heck down when I feel as if I’m about to break in two, or like breast feeding after the labor is all said and done and the actual taking care of a newborn begins.

I met Cheryl Murfin while I was working at my salon.  I was tending to another lady when Cheryl marched right up to my chair and asked which one of us was pregnant.  Since both my client and I are pregnant, all we could do was laugh and say “Me!”  Turns out, Cheryl is a doula who had heard through salon scuttlebutt that I was a pregnant lady and decided to come around with her card.  I immediately took to her direct approach!  I love Seattle, but am not native to the Pacific NorthWest and am often a little turned off by the typical north-westerner’s politely standoffish way.  This woman came over and told me what she did in 20 words or less!  She was practically New York in my book.   I made a mental note to ask my midwife if she had any more information on this lady.  As it turns out, Lynn at Rainy City knew Cheryl very well.  Cheryl was the director of the Seattle Midwifery School and is very tied in to the community here.  I decided to call her for an appointment…

We met today and it all felt so comfortable!  I feel like she’s the other hand on deck we need for this delivery, which will make the total of people in the house during the birthing a whopping 6 (Milton, me, 1 midwife, 2 midwife students, and our doula)!  7 if you count our baby!  Practically a party for our small loft (if it doesn’t sell by the end of February, we’re staying right here, folks).  I can’t imagine that this baby will feel anything but love and support when he gets here.

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

1 Josh Mon, Jan 11th, 2010 at 5:22 pm

Congratulations! Doulas . . . don’t give birth without one. Glad to hear the Pseudonymn family found theirs.


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